Thursday, July 19, 2012

50 Shades of Grey Chapter 8, in which they finally start banging.


Alright, so, warning, this is the chapter that they get to the boning, and while I'm not posting anything TOO explicit, I'm putting a NSFW warning here. I mean, I talk about blow jobs and fisting and tickling prostates with egg beaters, so I imagine this blog isn't very SFW to start with, but this chapter has the actual fucking, so, yeah. NSFW. Plus, when you're laughing as hard as I am as I wrote this (or I hope you are. I'm a little drunk, so that could be making me think I'm extra hilarious.) and someone asks you what on EARTH you keep giggling at, you might not want to explain to your cubicle mate that you're reading something making fun of porn. It'll be awkward, so, you've been warned. Continue at your own risk, and delight. Grab a drink kids, this one's going to be fun!

So Grey is freaking out that Ana is a virgin and he didn't know, because he now must sacrifice her to his Dark Lord Satan. Or the in text reason is because “Oh fuck I just showed a virgin my freaky sex room” which was notably missing a sex swing. If you're going to have a kinky sex room wouldn't you have a swing? And maybe a stripper pole? Come on now. So Grey calms down and once again offers Ana an out and she's all “Nah I'm good”. Grey asks some normal questions “Is there any special reason you've never been boned?” We get a confirmation that he actually wasn't her first kiss. She was kissed twice before, though I'm not sure by who. Is she counting Jose?

We’re going to rectify the situation right now.”
What do you mean? What situation?”
Your situation. Ana, I’m going to make love to you, now.”
Oh.” The floor has fallen away. I’m a situation. I’m holding my breath.
That’s if you want to, I mean, I don’t want to push my luck.”
I thought you didn’t make love. I thought you fucked hard.” I swallow, my mouth suddenly dry.
He gives me a wicked grin, the effects of which travel all the way down there.
I can make an exception, or maybe combine the two, we’ll see. I really want to make love to you. Please, come to bed with me. I want our arrangement to work, but you re­ally need to have some idea what you’re getting yourself into. We can start your training tonight – with the basics. This doesn’t mean I’ve come over all hearts and flowers, it’s a means to an end, but one that I want, and hopefully you do too.” His gray gaze is intense.

That's right, being a virgin is a situation. Still, Grey's not being a total dick hole here. He says he'll hold off on all the rigid rules and craziness and ease her into it so she can decide what she's going into because hot DAMN does he want a piece of her pasty mousy ass (hey, she calls herself mousy first!). He also keeps reiterating “I'm not going to push it do what you feel comfortable with.” which I'm going to assume is part of his black magic powers. The real reason he wants to bang her – NOW – is so he doesn't have to tie her to the cross in her dungeon to sacrifice her to his Dark Lord. So she consents after some lip nibbling to go to bed with him and they wander across the giant apartment to his bedroom. And then we get into the sex scene. I'm torn on how to handle this, do I put up the whole kit-and-caboodle and make this post totally NSFW? Do I just put excerpts to give you guys a feeling for it? No, I'm going to post single out of context lines. Why? Because it's funnier this way, and I can't imagine them doing anything too crazy this time around.

Ah,” I groan.

Because you need to verify that “ah” is what you're groaning.

He leans forward, running his nose up the apex between my thighs. I feel him. There.

Because James' editors refused to let her use the word “peepee”.

You smell so good,” he murmurs and closes his eyes, a look of pure pleasure on his face, and I practically convulse. He reaches up and tugs the duvet off the bed, then pushes me gently so I fall on to the mattress.

His room IS decorated with aquatic themes, so maybe he just really enjoys him some fish? Also, I dunno about you, but I don't usually have the presence of mind to be all “Okay, blanket, floor” unless I'm tripping over it.

You’re very beautiful, Anastasia Steele. I can’t wait to be inside you.”
Holy shit. His words. He’s so seductive. He takes my breath away.

I get that this is the tender love making scene, but “can't wait to be inside you”? Couldn't go for “I can't wait to fuck you so hard you won't be able to form a full sentence for a week”?

How do you make yourself come? I want to see.”
I shake my head.
I don’t,” I mumble. He raises his eyebrows, astonished for a moment, and his eyes darken, and he shakes his head in disbelief.

Are you ready for Ana's first orgasm?! Because I sure am! BRING ON THE ORAL SEX!

Oh… I can’t keep still. How can I not move? I wriggle beneath him.
We’re going to have to work on keeping you still, baby.”

IT WILL BE PART OF YOUR TRAINING! Hey, he did say he'd “train” her earlier. Also, again with the baby. It seems... Wrong, from him. That said, I've always found “baby” or “babe” a weird and creepy term of endearment, as there is something totally unsexy about being a baby to me. It does play into him not wanting a woman but a girl he can control and play dress up with. Also, dude, don't you... You know, WANT her to move? No one wants to bang a dead fish unless- Oh God.

...and my nipples harden under his steady gaze....

... “Very nice,” he whispers appreciatively, and my nipples harden even more....

...and his thumb slowly rolls the end of my nipple, elongating it.

This is all within a paragraph and a half. Nipples really can only get so hard. I'm sorry, James, but nipples can't cut glass. Do we need to sit down and have the talk many fan fiction writers need about how sex and anatomy actually work?

Wait, wait, time for Ana's first orgasm! Are you guys excited? I'm excited.

Oh… please,” I beg, and I pull my head back, my mouth open as I groan, my legs stiffening. Holy hell, what’s happening to me?
Let go, baby,” he murmurs. His teeth close round my nipple, and his thumb and finger pull hard, and I fall apart in his hands, my body convulsing and shattering into a thousand pieces. He kisses me, deeply, his tongue in my mouth absorbing my cries.
Oh my. That was extraordinary. Now I know what all the fuss is about. He gazes down at me, a satisfied smile on his face, while I’m sure there’s nothing but gratitude and awe on mine.

High-five Ana! Now you're a woman! Although she just had her first orgasm just from him playing with her nipples. I know that's actually a thing that can happen. There ARE women out there, but they are far and few between. So, bets on how many times Ana is going to orgasm this sack session? I'm going to guess three.

You are very responsive,” he breathes. “You’re going to have to learn to control that, and it’s going to be so much fun teaching you how.” He kisses me again.

Wait, isn't being super responsive a GOOD thing? Or is he afraid that she'll be raw and sore too quickly? :/

His hand moves down my waist, to my hips, and then cups me, intimately... Jeez.

Jeez?! That is your response to pending finger banging when you're still positively dripping? When you were begging for it moments ago?

You’re so deliciously wet. God, I want you.” He thrusts his finger inside me, and I cry out as he does it again and again. He palms my clitoris, and I cry out once more.

Vagina is there but clitoris, that's fine.

Pulling off his boxer briefs, his erection springs free. Holy cow… He reaches over to his bedside table and grabs a foil packet, and then he moves between my legs, spreading them further apart. He kneels up and pulls a condom on to his considerable length. Oh no…Will it? How?
Don’t worry,” he breathes, his eyes on mine, “You expand too.”

And you wanted to give Kate the safe sex talk? I don't think you're qualified for that, Ana.

I’m going to fuck you now, Miss Steele,” he murmurs as he positions the head of his erection at the entrance of my sex. “Hard,” he whispers, and he slams into me.

No, Grey, you're supposed to be gentle with the first thrust, and THEN you build up to the rough thrusting. This? This would just hurt like a bitch, even with some rough finger blasting first.

Aargh!” I cry as I feel a weird pinching sensation deep inside me as he rips through my virginity.

I just want to take a moment to revel in this for a moment. “Rips through my virginity”. I'm not the only one who burst out laughing at this, right? Please tell me I'm not alone on this one. Again, sounds less sexy, more hilariously uncomfortable. She totally just yelled “argh” during, too. Awesome.

I nod, my eyes wide, my hands on his forearms. I feel so full. He stays still, letting me acclimatize to the intrusive, overwhelming feeling of him inside me.

Want to know what would have let you acclimatize better Ana? Had he gone in slowly to start with and built up speed, rather then BAM and NOW we go sloooowly in and out, him double checking between each thrust. Don't get me wrong, no issue with a quick entrance here, but she IS a virgin, and, ow. I remember my first time. It lasted about 15 minutes, which is about as much as I was able to handle at that point because while it wasn't a ZOMG OW (because he was, you know, gentle because HEY I WAS A VIRGIN! Funny that.) and then about twenty minutes after that we went again to much better results. Go team? Anyways, I always see “feeling full” being used to describe a good dicking, but, I'm not the only one who's never ever wanted to use that phrase to describe their sexual encounters, right? "Full" sounds uncomfortable.I think of being bloated from eating too much.

He moves slowly at first, easing himself in and out of me. And as I grow accustomed to the alien feeling, my hips move tentatively to meet his.

WHY DID YOU NOT START WITH THAT?!?! You want to “train” her then this is the way to start, not “okay, on three...” So we get some more generic they fucking and then time for Ana's second orgasm!

I start to stiffen as he thrusts on and on. My body quivers, bows, a sheen of sweat gathers over me. Oh my… I didn’t know it would feel like this… didn’t know it could feel as good as this. My thoughts are scattering... there’s only sensation... only him... only me… oh please… I stiffen.
Come for me, Ana,” he whispers breathlessly, and I unravel at his words, exploding around him as I climax and splinter into a million pieces underneath him. And as he comes, he calls out my name, thrusting hard, then stilling as he empties himself into me.

BUT YOU ALREADY SHATTERED WHICH MEANS HE'S JUST EJACULATING ONTO A PILE OF BITS! Man, I feel so sorry for his cleaning lady. Then again, he DOES have a dungeon, so... I guess this isn't much new for her. Okay, so, two orgasms. I was off.

Did I hurt you?” Christian asks as he lies down beside me propped on one elbow. He tucks a stray strand of my hair behind my ear. And I have to grin, widely.
You are asking me if you hurt me?”
The irony is not lost on me,” he smiles sardonically. “Seriously, are you okay?” His eyes are intense, probing, demanding even.
...
Two orgasms… coming apart at the seams, like the spin cycle on a washing machine, wow. I had no idea what my body was capable of, could be wound so tightly and released so violently, so gratifyingly. The pleasure was indescribable.

I take back everything mean I've said about this book so far. This shit is HILARIOUS. I will never be able to look at laundry the same again. I don't think you guys even need me here this chapter. Okay, they're at it again, this time from behind!

I cannot move my head. I am pinioned beneath him, helpless.

Pinioned. Hee.

You are mine,” he whispers. “Only mine. Don’t forget it.” His voice is intoxicating, his words heady, seductive.

Otherwise you're going on the cross in the dungeon and I'm sacrificing you to Satan after all! Doesn't matter that she hasn't checked the "I have read and agreed to the terms and conditions" box yet, she's his! His you hear me?!

You smell divine,” he nuzzles behind my ear.

You said that already.

The effect is mind-blowing – all my energy concentrating on this one small space inside my body. I moan.
You like this?”

No, I'm just over here a dripping writhing mass because it's only alright.”

You’re so wet, so quickly. So responsive. Oh, Anastasia, I like that. I like that a lot,” he whispers.

Weren't you just saying you were going to break her of being so responsive earlier? I mean, this makes way more sense to me, but, huh?

Open your mouth,” he commands and thrusts his thumb in my mouth. My eyes fly open, blinking wildly.
See how you taste,” he breathes against my ear. “Suck me, baby.”

Okay, I'm not the only one who thinks the phrase “Suck me, baby” belongs on a t-shit, am I? Also I'm not the only one who thinks that calling someone baby while asking them to suck a thumb adds an extra layer of creepy to the pet-name “Baby”, right?

His thumb presses on my tongue, and my mouth closes round him, sucking wildly.

She's giving him the crazy eye as she sucks his thumb.

I taste the saltiness on his thumb and the faint metallic tang of blood. Holy fuck. This is wrong, but holy hell is it erotic.

She has learned what she tastes like before he has. Bad Grey. Also, remember what I said about Kate was being established by things Ana said, but it didn't match with what she did? Because telling me something is erotic does not make it so.

Fuck my mouth! I moan, and I bite down on him. He gasps, and he pulls my hair tighter, painfully, so I release him.
Naughty, sweet girl,” he whispers, and then reaches over to the bedside table for a foil packet. “Stay still, don’t move,” he orders as he releases my hair.

Hooray mouth fucking! She's also biting his thumb, not his dick, though it does have some concerning parallels for Grey at the moment. I'm also a little confused by the “Naughty, sweet girl,” line. It may be the vodka, but again, nothing Ana has done reads as “sweet” to me. She hasn't even giving him a super enthusiastic beej yet! Also I get bondage is immobilizing, but that's usually less about “I don't want you to move” and “I want you to be frustrated with your inability to move” which are kinda different, because you're still going to move. It has also occurred to me that Ana has done a lot of laying there and taking it.

I want you sore, baby,” he murmurs, and he continues his sweet, leisurely torment, backward, forward.
Every time you move tomorrow, I want you to be reminded that I’ve been here. Only me. You are mine.”

Dude, her hymen was somehow magically still intact (I'm assuming it's fairly common knowledge that most girls pop theirs doing sports (or gym class) or using tampons before they actually have sex. Though he would have popped it when he finger blasted her during foreplay...) she's going to be sore. You also just took her virginity. Even if it was awesome, she's gonna be sore. Trust.

You. Are. So. Sweet,” he murmurs between each thrust. “I. Want. You. So. Much.”
I moan.
You. Are. Mine. Come for me, baby,” he growls.

HOW? IS? SHE? SWEET?! This. Is. Really. Starting. To. Bug. Me. Readers, help me out here. Alright, time for orgasm number 3! CALLED THE NUMBER!

His words are my undoing, tipping me over the precipice. My body convulses around him, and I come, loudly calling out a garbled version of his name into the mattress, and Christian follows with two sharp thrusts, and he freezes, pouring himself into me as he finds his release. He collapses on top of me, his face in my hair.

Because everyone always achieves simultaneous orgasm, amIrite? Ana then just passes right the fuck out, exhausted from her big day of boneing. I'm sad now, because now the banging is over which means that they'll be talking again. Booo.

Ana wakes up, in Grey's bed (I think? I don't think he moves her...) which is a No-No but it's not the first time. He's not there, though. He's playing the piano. And, oh, this is almost as good as the fucking.

Christian is at the piano, completely lost in the music he’s playing. His expression is sad and forlorn, like the music. His playing is stunning. Leaning against the wall at the en­trance, I listen enraptured. He’s such an accomplished musician. He sits naked, his body bathed in the warm light cast by a solitary freestanding lamp beside the piano. With the rest of the large room in darkness, it’s like he’s in his own isolated little pool of light, untouch­able… lonely, in a bubble.

He has just boned the object of his obsession for... However long this book has been, (there was a time jump with exams) few weeks (?) and now he is sitting, sadly playing the piano. Naked. Naked. If he's someone who just prefers to me naked, hey, good on him, I also have a strong aversion to pants, but I don't think Grey IS a nudist. So Ana pads over, wrapped in nothing but the blanket,

I notice now that he’s wearing PJ pants.

Boooo.

I find it difficult to sleep, and I’m not used to sleeping with anyone,” he murmurs. I can’t fathom his mood. He seems a little despondent, but it’s difficult to tell in the dark­ness. Perhaps it was the tone of the piece he was playing.

He walks her back to bed, but his bed, not the special bedroom that she gets to decorate however she wants later.

We both glance down at the bed at the same time. There’s blood on the sheets – evi­dence of my lost virginity. I flush, embarrassed, pulling the duvet tighter around me.
Well, that’s going to give Mrs. Jones something to think about,” Christian mutters as he stands in front of me.

Do you clean your own dungeon, then? Also gross. Do you not own another set of sheets?

I realize that I’ve not seen his naked chest before. Instinctively, I reach out to run my fingers through the smattering of dark hair on his chest to see how it feels. Immediately, he steps back out of my reach.
... I don’t think I’ve ever touched his torso. He opens a chest of drawers and pulls out a t-shirt and quickly slips it on.

He also left his shirt on until he was fucking her from behind during, so he's got some hang up about being shirtless, despite the fact that we've seen him wandering around shirtless on several occasions. I think this is a carry over from when it was still fan fiction and he was still a vampire, but it's a bit strange. I get that we're supposed to notice it though, so, yeah. There's no mention of scars so I'm going to rule out surgery he's had in the past (though being scarred from that sort of thing would make him way more interesting to me personally.).

Bed,” he orders again. I climb back onto the bed, trying not to think about the blood.

DO YOU NOT OWN OTHER SHEETS GREY?!

Sleep, sweet Anastasia,” he murmurs, and I close my eyes, but I can’t help feel a re­sidual melancholy either from the music or his demeanor. Christian Grey has a sad side.

Really?! I didn't get that from your narrative bashing me over the head with him playing sad music and being in his sad naked bubble (that was not naked at all you tease). Or the fact that the book is titled "50 Shades of Grey" to imply that he's SO DEEP!

And that brings us to the end of chapter eight. I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I did! Please, share your thoughts in the comments, they give me a happy.

164 comments:

  1. Good to know I'm not the only one who finds "Baby" to be the creepiest term of endearment ever. I vetoed that one pretty quick in my relationship.

    Also, I get that she has to be pure and untouched to be a proper fantasy. I don't agree, but apparently that's a thing that women who are not me like? But she can't have even touched herself? Really? Is being the most passive person ever actually most women's fantasy?

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    1. In fairness, I know I didn't fap until I was seventeen or eighteen. And I still don't very much. Some people just don't.

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  2. Brain. Brain not working now. Braaaaaaain.

    Okay. I can find something mundane to focus on. Ragepiano. Well, maybe not rage exactly, because he apparently bones her (sounding at least like he's enjoying the process like a mostly-normal-person) and then slips away to play the Anthem Of Inner Torment in his Spotlight Of Loneliness, and all I can think about is the scene in Footloose where Kevin Bacon can only express All Of His Feels through a long spontaneous dance sequence inside the most convenient warehouse ever, complete with gymnastic-class bars and mats lying around. That was clearly ragedancing. I'm not sure what this is. I'm going to default to griefpiano until it's resolved. WHAT IS HIS TRAGIC PAST?

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  3. And of COURSE she has mind-blowing orgasms the first (three!) time(s). Cause it's JUST THAT EASY when the Magical Brooding One is your lovah!

    Love this snark - I look forward to it every week! :-)

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    1. Yes. My seething resentment, let me show you it. It's always some ~*~*~*maaaaagical*~*~* orgasm factory for creepily-immature Mary Sues, with none of the awkward moments or trial-and-error whoa-not-that moments that any person who's ever had any kind of sex will face at least once. I suppose these horrible men all have unicorn boners or something but seriously, I hate that even theoretical good sex is wasted on romance-novel characters.

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    2. The de-virginazation orgasm is actually a common trope in romance novels but one that I have always hated because in real life,it rarely ever happens.

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    3. I had a couple orgasms my first time, but then I'm not Ana. During my high school years I spent a lot of time figuring my own body out and masturbating like a son-of-a-bitch. No one in my hometown attracted me enough and I needed some way to calm down the raging hormones! Then when I got to college I found a guy who knew what he was doing and was willing to listen to my directions, and I actually had a pretty good first time. But like you said, instances of mind-blowing cherry-popping are few and far between. Hell I wouldn't even consider my experience mind-blowing, just damn better than all the horror stories I heard from girls in high school.

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  4. This probably needed a bottle all by itself. Kudos to you for getting through it and still being lucid enough to write the post.

    If this is the first time in bed for Ana, then the egg-beater tickling its going to be...intense, let's say. Also, being fantasy material, of course he's huge, but erm, I would think that means a lot more ow and a lot less zOMG, unless he's magically also able to know exactly where to go to not hurt her all of these times... vampire charm, maybe?

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  5. *snerk*

    If you have to use a euphemism like "there" to talk about your feel good bits, maybe you aren't ready for the hot multiple orgasm rough doin' its...

    I love the snark! I hope you don't get alcohol poisoning by the end of this stupid stupid book!

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  6. I am toasting you with a tiny bottle of Moscato, because clearly you have to be some sort of superior being to be able to read and analyze this lunacy without going completely bugnuts and climbing up a clock tower with a Supersoaker full of pudding.

    Which, doesn't that sound kind of fun?

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  7. Okay, since all my knowledge of this book is coming from you, I've got to ask - exactly how long did it take them to start banging? "Forever" is obviously the correct answer, but what's the page count? And how many pages are there total? How much of this porn novel was sexlessly creepy, rather than the other kind?

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  8. To everyone wishing my liver well, it thanks you.

    @Anonymous 2 - That is largely what disturbs me so much about these books. People are clamoring over themselves for a fantasy of a woman who willingly and happily strips herself of agency and power. In a world where women still have to fight to get and exercise these things.

    @Will - Is it wrong that I take so much delight in breaking your brain? Because I don't think that will ever loose it's appeal. Ever. Also Footloose set me up for years of disappointment in not being able to find conveniently placed warehouses to rage dance in.

    @mickeymo - Thanks! And one day I will write a chick-flick deconstruction that actually depicts a first time that COULD happen. I remember when I read the Sookie Stackhouse books back in high school just being glad they ACKNOWLEDGED that it hurt her as before they got to the mind blowing orgasms.

    @Ice - I likely will but I live in Canada, so, free health care!

    @ Fahnette- BRB getting a giant supersoaker and some pudding mixes.

    @ Vardulon - The book is 356 pages *whimper* and they start banging on page 79 (if only it had been 10 pages earlier...) but tragically not every chapter will be them fucking, so there's still plenty of time for more sexless creepyness.

    I will tease you all a little bit and say brace yourselves for chapter 10. I'll probably have to run it in two parts so I can get all the rage and awful at it out. I started off sober trying to write it. I did not end sober writing it. There was yelling at the computer. The Boy was confused.

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    1. The thing that really confuses me is who the fantasy is supposed to appeal to. I'm not a pure, chaste, untouched-even-by-my-own-hand woman, and I don't know very many women who are. I'm also not an agencyless passive woman, and I know absolutely no women like that. I understand why the ideal fantasy man is unattainable and impossible. I just don't get why I'm given a reader-insert character that I cannot relate to at all.

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    2. I wish you had left a name so I could credit you when I steal the phrase "unicorn boner" which I will be doing as soon as I humanly can.

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  9. Dear you,
    You are not allowed to do any more of these unless you've had at least three shots. Your commentary got more hilariously mean the more you drank and it was excellent. Carry on.
    -AdalynLeigh

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  10. Something that really bothered me was that, with all the finger banging and sex, how did she NOT get a yeast infection???

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  11. I'm changing my mind on the author. I don't think this fantasy is about her wanting to have kinky sex with a dominator, I think SHE wants to control a young virgin. (Didnt this just crank the creep factor through the roof?)

    Seriously, a virgin, who has never touched herself. Riiiight, suuuuure. Like she didn't touch herself with the freaking body wash in the shower.... DUH. And she goes on opretending she barely knows where IT will go and how it will fit. She never watched TV in her life?

    So far, except for the laughing (thank you!) this book doesn't do anything except make me so angry!!! (I'd start drinking too but I'm still at work lol)

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  12. So after pretty much being jack hammered her first time (ouch) she came three times? and two of those times simultaneously with Grey? That sounds believable.I know we are supposed to feel sorry for all the sadness of Christian play his sad song on his sad piano but all I could think of was emo bun.I know I have said it before but he's coming off more Patrick Bateman than Prince Charming.

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  13. is it realy suposed to be sexy to take her tampon out and have sex with her on her period?
    Reading that just made our decicion that this must be a crappy book. not worth the $12.
    i may have read that part on another website.

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    1. She bled on the sheets because it was her first time having sex, not because she was on her period.

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  14. I wrote better than this before I grew out of writing Snape fanfiction on MySpace. Gee whiz, I should have stuck with it and changed the names. I could have made a million.

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  15. I came across your page and I love it! Your comments make the book so much more intresting! I thought alot of the same things while reading. Thanks for the laugh!

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  16. This book sucks, I agree, but that fish comment was incredibly sexist.

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  17. This was posted on one of my favorite Facebook groups, Fifty Shades of Craptastic Grey (An Anti-Fan Page).

    What I posted there was: "BLURG. My skin isn't crawling, it's trying to LEAP off my body and slither under the fridge. Were it not for my skinny jeans I might be in critical condition right now."

    It's people like you who allow me to hate on these... books... with everything I have without actually having to pay money and put myself through the torture of reading them. There was a time when I believed that one shouldn't bash something one has not experienced. Two horrific (yet popular) series read in full later, and I'm finished with that philosophy.

    FSOG is the biggest pet peeve I've ever had, and I could not be more grateful for the faith in humanity I've regained from those who mock it so deftly. Thank you, Eri!

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  18. Woah i just heard of this book today haha It's not as bad as people say it is

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  19. This deflowering is very... cliche. I've seen this exact pattern time and time again: one big thrust to break the hymen, then a long pause to let the pain fade, then very slow, gentle motion until she's begging for more (indicating that the soreness is wearing off). It's like, Deflowering 101 or something.

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  20. I have to go to the store to buy this book RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!

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  21. Omg. This is supposed to be awesome erotic fiction? I have read better Avon novels. I do read some romance novels, but usually they're not written by a horny 5th grader. Good one on you for decimating this atrocious piece of crap!!

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  22. Actually, the hymen 'popping' thing is a myth. You see the hymen does not cover the whole of the vagina, it's only a semi circle of *stretchy* membrane. When you have sex, masturbate, give birth - if you are lubricated and relaxed enough - the hymen *stretches* along with the vaginal walls to make space for the penis, vibrator, fingers, head of the baby.

    It is NOT meant to tear (and since it does not cover the whole of the vagina it cannot be 'popped' (and if it did cover the whole of your vagina, how does your period blood escape?)) it's meant to stretch during sex. It can be torn through not being prepared your first time, second, tenth, hundred, thousandth time. YOU ARE NOT MEANT TO BLEED FROM YOUR VAGINA DURING SEX. EVER!

    If Ana is as wet as James describes her as, she should not have bled in any sense.
    Just thought I'd put that out there ^^.

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  23. I found this hilarious. Your opinions after each line made me laugh. I'm very glad I read this :) Totally made my night.

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  24. LMAO!!!!!!! Oh my gosh this was so great! My cousins have been fawning over this book and I've been in the shadows saying, "seriously? is it that great?" "Oh yes! Better even!"

    ROFL honestly, i masterbated alot as a tenn, but somehoe was a virgin at 20, and I can tell ya that no virgin I know would acually want her first time in a BDSM dungeon - unless she was a CSA survior in which case fantasizing about it is a norm, but acually wanting to do it is a bit different...

    But in any case this made my day!! I'm going to be giggling all week!

    ReplyDelete
  25. I never read this book. I heard so much good things about it, but now that I've read the excerpt, I see that it's nothing impressive. It's just another typical, crappy teen romance novel.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Stop....saying...baby -.-

    ReplyDelete
  27. OMG, this made me laugh so much, which I totally needed on this shitty day.
    I read the book(s), giving in to peer pressure, but this is actually way more fun.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Shit i hate this book..... i read it and practically couldnt sleep..... doesnt she have a freaking life and some self respect...... some people actually find that kinky bastard romantic..... get a life people..... xD

    ReplyDelete
  29. :D:D:D Now I see that the book was given the wrong genre. Thanks to the author for making my day!

    ReplyDelete
  30. John willy kik mehApril 1, 2013 at 1:07 AM

    I'm hard

    ReplyDelete
  31. Christina TenishaApril 3, 2013 at 7:48 PM

    LOOOL I laughed so much with this! your thoughts on each bit are hilarioua

    ReplyDelete
  32. Not all fan fic writers suck at writing erotic scenes though. ;) Unfortunately, you probably need to wade through millions of fan fic to get to the well-written ones. :) Thanks for reading this though, so we don't have to. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  33. Dare: Read this in an epic voice by a female friend.

    ReplyDelete
  34. "Baby" should never be used here.

    ReplyDelete
  35. This was quite funny I almost bought the book just to see what all the fuss was about but I'm glad I didn't its more arousing to just call up my boyfriend and have him talk dirty to me then to read this book (hats off to you who like this stuff though)

    ReplyDelete
  36. Reading your comments on this....I physically died laughing. This is too much. TOO MUCH! You're hilarious

    ReplyDelete
  37. I have a boner

    ReplyDelete
  38. BitchThisBookSUCKSJune 2, 2013 at 6:12 PM

    lolz! Exact process I go through when reading a book.. Especially this shit! Is this how this woman thinks life works? She needs help. I don't get the excitement AT ALL!

    ReplyDelete
  39. By the way, I don't think that Kate is the one you should not like. I think Ana is the one using HER. Ana doesn't get to pa rent, yet what we've seen is that she doesn't like Kate much (except when she SAYS she does). She doesn't care about Kate's interests or projects (just pretends to) and whenever Kate shows concern for Ana, Ana's like "That bitch, how dare she!" Kate (like myself) is a sharer - she's just randomly talks about stuff that's going on with her, because she likes keeping conversation and because she is fine with people knowing stuff about her. Ana (like my friends) is a more private person - she doesn't like talking randomly about whatever is in her life - maybe just the important stuff. On it's own that's totally fine, the problem is that whenever Kate shows concern for her or you know - friendship, Ana's annoyed. When she does something for Kate she annoyed and complains (even just to herself). This is not a normal response towards someone's FRIENDSHIP, is it? This also fits in with "Ana is a lesbian and in love with Kate, but is totally in the closet and conflicted about her own sexuality,"
    Btw, sorry for not writing this in a chapter where it's more relevant, but I had a problem with the comments.

    ReplyDelete
  40. Nasty-Sweet-Surgar-Darlin'June 29, 2013 at 6:08 PM

    Never read 50 shades if Grey, but hey this is way more fun and your prespective is awesome and hilarious

    ReplyDelete
  41. Not a horny 5th graderJuly 9, 2013 at 7:22 PM

    This whole thing had me Laughing so hard and the whole time I was thinking to myself That is exactly what I was saying when I read This book. And btw you are not alone by thinking him calling her baby is creepy ( Christian Grey is just creepy period ) And It is very much true Ana is anything but sweet. YOU ARE SCREWING THE DARK LORD HIMSELF AND ENJOYING IT!!!! THAT IS NOT SWEET AT ALL!!!! but before I talk about every single thing in that book I should really end this comment. BYE!!!! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  42. okay, so a couple of years ago -when I was recruting some book readers for book club in HS- I was confronted by two girls, giggling and holding 50 Shades of Gray, they asked me if I ever read the book before and I simply said no, they giggled and walked away. a friend of mine told me about the book sometime later when I mentioned the whole scene; she had told me that the sex excerpts were /horrible/. I didn't believe her until I looked it up, and holy cow there are better sex scenes writen by 10 year olds on fanfiction.net. that's sad! and I heard that this is going to be a /movie/?! what the hell?! what is this world coming to?! honestly!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Thank you! Best laugh I've had in a long time!

    ReplyDelete
  44. WHAT IS GOING ON !?!?!?!?!?!?!
    THIS IS JUST PORN (REALLY GROSS PORN!!!)

    ReplyDelete
  45. I was siting laughing at the way you explained this oh my god

    ReplyDelete
  46. Merely the sexual fantasy written by a mid-ager who so obviously feels the boat has left without her. Could surely only be enjoyed by those who share a similar state of mind and would have most likely been satisfied fifty years ago with a wee bit of a descriptive Mills & Boon romance. Yawn.

    ReplyDelete
  47. I found this site when I got curious about the uproar in casting. I have had no interest in this book other than to wonder why everyone is thinking this is the next great novel.

    Your comments crack me up.

    I've seen better coherent sex scenes in fan fiction written by alleged teenagers than this ridiculous mess of argh's and baby's written here.

    ReplyDelete
  48. As I was reading this all I could hear was Roseanne Barr narrating it. Lol

    ReplyDelete
  49. My mom read the whole series... my. life. is. over. AWKWARD--let's be real, this is straight up porn. This is worse than I imagined... who reads this trash (other than my mom, apparently)???

    ReplyDelete
  50. All i can say is that you are DEAD on in your keen observations of this chapter and I realize right now im 3 Jameson Whiskeys in as i read this but it was F#@!*ing hilarious your comments and i laughed reading the whole way.... Good stuff good stuff........ I needed the laughs so thanks for rocking it out on your observations and editing on the side!!!! Peace out sister

    ReplyDelete
  51. oh my god, this is hilarious! thank you, you've just made my day. :)

    ReplyDelete
  52. Your commentary for this was hilarious, it's so fun reading someone realistically pick apart this dross. Haha, thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  53. Omigod your comments are hilarious! This is totally a pathetic book, just porn for a horny 5th grader. Thank you for commenting and pointing out all the things wrong with this chapter!! Loved every second of reading, lmao. And to whoever wrote "Unicorn Boner" you are fantastically creative, my friend.

    ReplyDelete
  54. The "suck me, baby" makes me think of Oz in American pie saying "suck me beautiful".

    ReplyDelete
  55. this is written more poorly than some fanfics

    ReplyDelete
  56. So THIS is the infamous 50 Shades of Grey I keep hearing about? I have to say, I'm not impressed.. I've read better smut written by a fanfiction author! This book is obviously some kind of joke!

    ReplyDelete
  57. I. Fucking. Love. You.

    ReplyDelete
  58. I reccommend the Sleeping Beauty Trilogy as far as erotic fiction goes.
    None of this talk for 10 chapters before the good stuff shit. Every page is a "hot part".

    ReplyDelete
  59. He must not own any sheets

    ReplyDelete
  60. This book is a piece of crap

    ReplyDelete
  61. This shit was fucking holarious

    ReplyDelete
  62. wtf seriously??? seriously??? the writting is so poor! I came here in curiosity because everyone is talking about this and I had better expectations. This seems to be written by a high school girl. I can't believe the low quality of the writting. I gues that's the reason why is so popular.... people nowadays have a very low reading eficiency.

    ReplyDelete
  63. nisaaaaannnnnnnnnnnOctober 14, 2013 at 2:50 PM

    hehe looool made me laugh u drunk guy

    ReplyDelete
  64. Never read this book, and I am so happy I didn't. This was hilarious, you had me cracking up!

    ReplyDelete
  65. I am not one to swear much. But this is the only way I can get my point across. I FUCKING love your FUCKING commentary. Like, I would literally love to see you do this with the other chapters so I can die from laughter. You're incredibly witty!!

    ReplyDelete
  66. I like how he orders her around like a dog and she just takes it. Like try talking to me like that and I'll be like, "Hahahaha no, you get in the bed full of blood."

    ReplyDelete
  67. Wow...for real??? For REAL??? This is coming to the big screen? What, as a tragi-comedy? This is typical low to medium-grade erotica at best. Kinda reads like an explicit version of 'Pride and Prejudice' coupled with a dash of 'Twilight' and some lightweight S&M thrown in for titillation. Christian IMHO appears to be a mix of Mr. Darcy (unable to clearly relate to the woman he is attracted to) and the self-loathing/brooding mood swings of Edward Cullen. As for the kink if you want well-written sex look no further than Nancy A. Collins 'Sonja Blue' series for starters.

    ReplyDelete
  68. Miss Adler.....you are sooo right comparing this with Twilight.....it's like Edward, all grown up and into kinky stuff.....lol.....and I have not read these books but this excerpt and commentary was hysterical!!! Whoever wrote this should write their own parodies of the Grey series! :)

    ReplyDelete
  69. BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! This, my friends, is what you use to torture annoying friends through the phone XD. This book is stupid af. I can't believe it XD.

    ReplyDelete
  70. You are just awesome. The way that you commented on each part of this ridiculous "erotic" story just made me burst into laughter because I thought of the same exact things before I read what u would say. I ended up reading your comments out loud haha

    ReplyDelete
  71. Wow lol this book reads like shit. This is really the same novel women are going crazy about? Kind of sad.

    ReplyDelete
  72. I'm still laughing at the part where his erection takes off his boxer briefs. If his penis is that flexible then the three orgasms aren't as unlikely as I thought.

    ReplyDelete
  73. I could tell you but that would ruin it ;)...........

    ReplyDelete
  74. This is the funniest blog I've read. I forwarded it to writer friends and bookstore owners. You are genius.

    ReplyDelete
  75. I was falling asleep reading this. Maybe my sex life is crazier.. Who knows ;) Reading this did kill some time I guess. :/

    ReplyDelete
  76. Hehehe I love your notations. It's very thought out, yet amusing. Thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  77. And people thought the Bush era sucked................the Obama administration is taking the cake by a mud slide pie on that one. I think everything sucks so bad, it's like you can't take it seriously. Miley Cyrus, Fifty Shades, economy, just everything is a joke now. Not even figuratively anymore it's gotten that bad. You just have to laugh at it all. Laugh at everything.

    ReplyDelete
  78. It's confusing.They put up such drama for the entire time,she's into him being sadistic,he wants to make her his pet,then the bitch asks him to punish her,he does so with a belt,and agter all the crap she runns away thinking they're incompatible.I like the BDB be'er.Hard-core erotica,romance,guns,cars and vampires.Waaaaay be'er than this human drama.

    ReplyDelete
  79. 50 Shades Movie

    Thanks for sharing...

    After seeing the trailers waiting for movie to be on screen in 2015......

    Theaters will be full with crowd....

    ReplyDelete
  80. great review! :D

    ReplyDelete
  81. Laughing So hard.! *Tears *

    ReplyDelete
  82. This is sooooo much better than the book, cried laughing at some bits! :')

    ReplyDelete
  83. Your comments are SO FUNNY! I am literally still laughing. Thanks :)

    ReplyDelete
  84. online link to this book http://kudabox.com/fifty-shades-of-grey-trilogy-pdf/

    ReplyDelete
  85. I was interested in reading this book, with all the hype and the amount of friends I have telling me how great it is. So here I am doing a little research and this just sealed the deal on my initial thought that it would be a total waste of time! I am someone you enjoys books and read all the time, read just these short sentences I cant see why people could read it? It doesn't sound like she has any self respect and he sounds like a total tool, but everyone has there options and taste I suppose. Anyways, thanks for this! I enjoyed reading your little snappy quips!

    ReplyDelete
  86. That was freakin hot!

    ReplyDelete
  87. Thank you Dr.Paul for helping me to reunite my relationship just within the period of 48 hours. I can still remember those period when i was having problems with my lover but today through the help of your great powers i am having joy in my relationship.thank you very much Dr Paul you can contact him for help through his email heritagespelltemple@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  88. Holy Cow!!! never read the book but the women at work r propa buzzn about it ....an erotic novel?? It seems hilarious to me ive had a good laugh after reading this the thumb suckn part being one of my favourites ha the book itself seems a joke but with your commentary aswell literally been laughn out loud ...can I mention how repetitive it is the same quotes over and over yawny yawn.

    ReplyDelete
  89. This made me laugh a little TOO much...Are there more of these? If NOT make some!

    ReplyDelete
  90. dr. marnish solved my relationship problem 3 days ago , i sent him some gift of appreciation for the Commitment love Spell he did for me, he made my lover to love me again. and to be committed to me again, i am very very much happy. dr.marnish brought me happiness, email dr.marnish@yahoo.com or call him +15036626930 he will turn your broken relationship around
    Rebecca Kemaya ,,../

    ReplyDelete
  91. Oh my God, I'm so glad to tell everyone the real thing that happen to me...My name is EMILIANO BABARAH. If i refuse to share this testimony it means i am selfish to my self and to people i love so much whom might have similar problems, March 16th about something 7:23pm after taken our dinner my husband got crazy started calling a lady name Melisa I love you, i was so mad and started crying like a baby...then my husband left home for the idiot called Melisa, and never return back home then i believed when he uthen nderstand his self he will surly come back to apology, but instead he left me So i complained to my friend she told me she was having such problems in her marriage until she was introduce to DR ORIOMON who specializes in bringing back broken homes and broken marriages DR ORIOMON cast a spell for me in May 4th surprisingly my husband came home May 6th apologizing that i should forgive him that it will never happen again, i was so glad and gave the thanks to DR ORIOMON who save my marriage, if you are having similar problem you can contact him and His email address is (oriomonspiritualtemple@yahoo.com) you can still save your marriage if u really love your husband.


    Thanks EMILIANO BABARAH_USA

    ReplyDelete
  92. Most idiotic book one earth, like instead of reothis, go on YouPorn!

    ReplyDelete
  93. Just curious. Why is it a no-no to leave the bed, leaving her untouched.
    -concerned male

    Please respond

    ReplyDelete
  94. I really want to thank Dr Ero for saving my marriage. My husband really treat me bad and left the home for almost 1 month i was sick because of this, then i contacted eromosalelovespell@outlook.com for help, they told me that my husband is under a great spell of another woman. They cast a spell of return back of love on him. And he came back home for forgiveness and today we are happy again, i want you all who are having relationship, ex and even husband problem to contact eromosalelovespell@outlook.com

    ReplyDelete
  95. I kept reading the Sleepy Beauty book thinking it was gonna get better but it didn't. WILL NOT read the other two, I don't understand how people actually enjoy those books.

    ReplyDelete
  96. U guys are just mad u cant get any from grey u lonley women haters at that I think it is romantic and you guys are just lookin for a quick turn on and u didnt find it so you are mad fuck off this is my fav book u nasty bitches

    ReplyDelete
  97. You may well poo poo this woman for writing such drivel, but this drivel has appealed to a HUGE number of women! Why is that? Why are you not writing the better stuff? She has made millions! Isn't that an achievement? How would you describe a penis entering a vagina without sounding ridiculous? Go do it!

    ReplyDelete
  98. If this book is a movie itll be advertised on porn websites.

    ReplyDelete
  99. this blog is fucking amzing. the tard that wrote the original book could take a leaf outta yore blog. i've read more porn in my christian grandfathers newspapers than in 50 shades of grey.
    whoever wrote this, i love you

    ReplyDelete
  100. I flove this! Finally, some people who actually agree with me. I laughed a lot while reading this book. Ana drove me insane! Waste of time.

    ReplyDelete
  101. Damn...I'm 14, and "mature" as people call it. I was curious as to what the hell the big deal about this book is and WOAH o_O that was crap...I get that she was a virgin, but Jesus! (Sorry no offence) He could've been waaaaaaay kinkier, and maybe called her something other than "baby". I get that this isn't the entire book, but I've read way worse.

    ReplyDelete
  102. LMFAO thats hilarious!!!

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  105. I know I am really late on this, but when the hype for the movie started, I was looking around for reviews as I have not read the books. Fantastic funny review of chapter 8, made me laugh and solidified why I will NOT be reading this series. Thanks!

    ReplyDelete
  106. http://kudabox.com/fifty-shades-of-grey-trilogy-pdf/

    ReplyDelete
  107. kudabox. com/fifty-shades-of-grey-trilogy-pdf/

    ReplyDelete
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    ReplyDelete
  109. Finished the 3 books and totally love them!

    The trailer too! It looks pretty awesome! I was totally blown away,
    especially when Ana Steele saw the Red Room! The handcuffs, blindfolds and the
    rope and I really got thrilled! And because of that, I searched for those
    handcuffs, blindfolds and even the sexy whip and I found it on AdamandEve[dot]com and they're even offering official
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    goodies. I used the code KINKY at the checkout to get the discount. I bought
    the Sexy Slave Kit and I can't wait for it to arrive!

    ReplyDelete
  110. Best feedback on a book…..EVER!!! Still laughing!

    ReplyDelete
  111. Funniest thing I've read in quite a while. The dialogue is hilariously terrible I don't understand why this book is so popular if she's saying stuff like "there" and "aargh"

    ReplyDelete
  112. Delhi angels escorts agencywe Provide Most High Profile Independent Female Escorts in delhi for VIP peoples.

    ReplyDelete
  113. This article is fucking hilarious! Wow!?!! I've been wondering how graphic this book was because I thought about reading it, while yes it's graphic I might just read it for a good laugh! Your take on the book is probably better than the book!

    ReplyDelete
  114. Hello everyone i want to share a live testimony on how Dr Osimen was able to bring my husband back to me, myself and my husband were on a serious breakup, even before then we were always quarreling fighting and doing different ungodly act..
    My husband packed his things out of the house and we had to live in different area, despite all this i was looking for a way to re_unite with my husband, not until i met Dr Osimen the great spell caster who was able to bring my husband back home, Dr Osimen cast a love spell for me, and after some time i started seen results about the spell....
    Today my family is back again and we are happy living fine and healthy, with Dr Osimen all my dream came through in re_uniting my marriage, friends in case you need the help of Dr Osimen kindly mail him on( osimenspelltemple@gmail.com ) Sir i will forever recommend you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  115. Not to be all know-it all bitchy type but earlier you said it was common knowledge that girls pop their hymen and that's actually wrong, girls actually don't pop their hymens...there's already a hole and I believe it just gets stretched. check out laci green's YouTube video about hymens :)

    ReplyDelete
  116. I want to make a Big thanks to a man that just brought back my ex husband and my Kid back to my life through his spell casting,i thought Dr.OHEHE is a fake when i first meet him due to our Language differences and he told me that there is nothing i should be worried about because he is ready to help me and he promise that my Husband will be the one to call me begging me that he wants me back,i thought it was a joke,to my surprise this happen and Mark my Husband and ZAK my Kid is back to me now and i am very happy with the help of DR OHEHE that bring back happiness into my life.. if you really need help or you are looking for a way to know him,you can contact him on +2347031362391 or email address: ohehenemenspelltemple001@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  117. I want to make a Big thanks to a man that just brought back my ex husband and my Kid back to my life through his spell casting,i thought Dr.OHEHE is a fake when i first meet him due to our Language differences and he told me that there is nothing i should be worried about because he is ready to help me and he promise that my Husband will be the one to call me begging me that he wants me back,i thought it was a joke,to my surprise this happen and Mark my Husband and ZAK my Kid is back to me now and i am very happy with the help of DR OHEHE that bring back happiness into my life.. if you really need help or you are looking for a way to know him,you can contact him on +2347031362391 or email address: ohehenemenspelltemple001@yahoo.com.

    ReplyDelete
  118. I want to make a Big thanks to a man that just brought back my ex husband and my Kid back to my life through his spell casting,i thought Dr.OHEHE is a fake when i first meet him due to our Language differences and he told me that there is nothing i should be worried about because he is ready to help me and he promise that my Husband will be the one to call me begging me that he wants me back,i thought it was a joke,to my surprise this happen and Mark my Husband and ZAK my Kid is back to me now and i am very happy with the help of DR OHEHE that bring back happiness into my life.. if you really need help or you are looking for a way to know him,you can contact him on +2347031362391 or email address: ohehenemenspelltemple001@yahoo.com..

    ReplyDelete
  119. cupcakesareastaplefoodOctober 15, 2014 at 6:47 AM

    Omg your comment made my day. Lol! I thought the exact same thing.

    ReplyDelete
  120. This should have been the real book it's not bizarre as e James ............. Nice one for ripping out the real truth

    ReplyDelete
  121. Salam Kenal, makasih ia Sahabat Blogger. ^_^ Sukses
    Selalu Buat Anda.

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    =======================================================



    Salam Kenal, makasih ia Sahabat Blogger. ^_^ Sukses
    Selalu Buat Anda.

    world tour booking
    flights and hotels
    - travel
    indonesian
    - obat
    kuat
    - Bisnis
    Tiket Pesawat Di Rumah




    ======================================================



    Salam Kenal, makasih ia Sahabat Blogger. ^_^ Sukses
    Selalu Buat Anda.

    world tour booking
    flights and hotels
    - travel indonesian
    - obat
    kuat
    - Bisnis Tiket Pesawat
    Di Rumah

    ReplyDelete
  122. Hello everyone I want to share a live testimony on how Dr Alex was able to bring my husband back to me, myself and my husband were on a serious breakup, even before then we were always quarreling fighting and doing different ungodly act..
    My husband packed his things out of the house and we had to live in different area, despite all this I was looking for a way to re_unite with my husband, not until I met Dr Alex the great spell caster who was able to bring my husband back home, Dr Alex cast a love spell for me, and after some time I started seen results about the spell....
    Today my family is back again and we are happy living fine and healthy, with Dr Alex all my dream came through in re_uniting my marriage, friends in case you need the help of Dr Alex kindly mail him on( solutionhelpcentre@gmail.com ) or call him on +2347036013351, Sir I will forever recommend you!

    ReplyDelete
  123. Hello everyone I want to share a live testimony on how Dr Alex was able to bring my husband back to me, myself and my husband were on a serious breakup, even before then we were always quarreling fighting and doing different ungodly act..
    My husband packed his things out of the house and we had to live in different area, despite all this I was looking for a way to re_unite with my husband, not until I met Dr Alex the great spell caster who was able to bring my husband back home, Dr Alex cast a love spell for me, and after some time I started seen results about the spell....
    Today my family is back again and we are happy living fine and healthy, with Dr Alex all my dream came through in re_uniting my marriage, friends in case you need the help of Dr Alex kindly mail him on( solutionhelpcentre@gmail.com ) or call him on +2347036013351, Sir I will forever recommend you

    ReplyDelete
  124. darcy austine Says!
    Am giving this testimony cos am happy.
    My name is darcy austine from kent,united kingdom.i never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once. when i went to Africa in June 28th 2013 last year on a business summit. i meant a man called DR JATTO. He is powerful he could help you cast a spells to bring back your love’s gone,misbehaving lover ,looking for some one to love you, bring back lost money and magic money spell or spell for a good job.i’m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 2 years… i really loved him, but his mother was against me and he had no good paying job. so when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to him..at first i was undecided,skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. and in 7 days when i returned to kent, my boyfriend (who is now my husband ) he called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married..i didn’t believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do… well we are happily married now and we have two kid,s and my husband also got a new job and our lives became much better. in case anyone needs the spell caster for some help, email address: DRJATTOSPELLHOME@GMAIL.COM. GREAT JATTO i thank you very much thank you in 1000000 times.. if not you i would have been losted and wasted thank you. Email Him Through his email address... DRJATTOSPELLHOME@GMAIL.COM. please make sure you contact him for any financial difficulties okay.. What a powerful man such as DR jatto.. he is so much powerful..\\ email him for any difficulties..

    ReplyDelete
  125. This is my testimony about the good work of a man who helped me....My name is maria cooker ... My life is back!!! After 8 years of marriage, my husband left me and left me with our three kids. I felt like my life was about to end, and was falling apart. Thanks to a spell caster called papa ork who i met online. On one faithful day, as I was browsing through the internet, I was searching for a good spell caster that can solve my problems. I came across series of testimonies about this particular spell caster. Some people testified that he brought their Ex lover back, some testified that he restores womb, some testified that he can cast a spell to stop divorce and so on. There was one particular testimony I saw, it was about a woman called grace,she testified about how papa ork brought back her Ex lover in less than 72 hours and at the end of her testimony she drop papa ork e-mail address. After reading all these,I decided to give papa a try. I contacted him via email and explained my problem to him. In just 3 days, my husband came back to me. We solved our issues, and we are even happier than before. papa ork is really a talented and gifted man and i will not to stop publishing him because he is a wonderful man...If you have a problem and you are looking for a real and genuine spell caster to solve that problem for you. Try the great papa ork today, he might be the answer to your problem. Here's his contact: orkstarspell@gmail.com Thank you great ork. Contact him for the following:

    (1)If you want your ex back.
    (2) if you always have bad dreams.
    (3)You want to be promoted in your office.
    (4)You want women/men to run after you.
    (5)If you want a child.
    (6)[You want to be rich.
    (7)You want to tie your husband/wife to be yours forever.
    (8)If you need financial assistance.
    (9)Herbal care
    10)Help bringing people out of prison
    Contact him today on:
    orkstarspell@gmail.com or visit his web site. www.orkstarspell.webs.com



    .......

    ReplyDelete
  126. Thanks to Dr Sk for saving my life from Hiv Aids....Am now negative. Thanks once again Dr. in case you need his help you can still contact him with his mobile number +2348158847627 or Email: dr.skhivhomefcure@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  127. Thanks to Dr Sk for saving my life from Hiv Aids....Am now negative. Thanks once again Dr. in case you need his help you can still contact him with his mobile number +2348158847627 or Email: dr.skhivhomefcure@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  128. Hi, my name is Derek Natasha. I have been in great bondage for almost 2 years suffering in the hands of a cheating husband,we were happy and leaving well until he meant his old time girl friend and he started dating her outside... our marriage before you knew it he stoped caring and taking care of his own family it was to the extent that he was planning to get married to her and divorce me his own wife, i have cried and reported him to his family but he never listened to any one but to cut my story short i came in search for a real spell caster who could destroy their relationship and make him come back to me and our 2 kids on my search i saw people making testimony on how their marriage where restored by Dr.Trust i pick his email and i narrated my story to him and he agreed to help me and after performing a spell on the second day both had a quarrel and he beat his girlfriend up and he came home begging for i and my little kids to forgive him that his eyes are clear now that he will never do any thing that will hurt his family again and promise to be a caring father and never cheat again.I am so so happy that i did not loose him to the girl. all appreciation goes to Dr.Trust for you are a Great spell caster and to whom this may concern if you have a cheating husband or wife or you need your ex lover back again. you can as well email him on (Ultimatespellcast@yahoo.com or ultimatespellcast@gmail.com) or you can call him +2348156885231.http://ultimatespellcast-net.webs.com

    ReplyDelete
  129. I NEVER BELIEVE IN LOVE SPELLS UNTIL DR OGOJI DID IT FOR ME


    My name is Miss Crystal and I’m from the United States.I’m writing this testimony to tell anyone who needs help No matter if it’s help for love,money or anything else there’s only one place to go to get this help there’s nothing to big they can help you with whatever your problem is. I had contacted them to get some help the Sunnice was very understanding in my situation and my problem the Sunnice told me everything I had to do to get this help and what was required of me,the Sunnice was always there to answer any question I had and was always quick in responding to my questions or any problem I had. They will be there for you every step of the way and will be by your side for as long as you need them. The Swamiji will solve any of your problems and get you the out come you deserve and want. If you want your lover back or you need help with any other situation all you have to do is contact this email address and ask for help.They are caring and understanding and will help you every step of the way.I never believed in magic or that there was anyone who could help until I contacted this email ogojidogospirituallovespell@gmail.com.!!!

    ReplyDelete
  130. DR SAMBOLA spelltemple is a place were all kinds of
    spiritual problems
    is been talking care off with his black magic spell
    without any side
    effect, Dr SAMBOLA spelltemple is an award winning
    temple with many
    years of experience. Him cast spell like
    love spell
    money spell
    election winning spell
    examination spell
    lotto winning spell
    beauty spell
    promotion spell
    and lot more contact today on greatsambolaspiritualtemple@gmail.com for
    any help and
    live a happy life today
    Because DR SAMBOLA just help me get my lost husband back to me a week ago. Thank you DR. My name is mrs .Bernice Lees

    ReplyDelete
  131. I will love to share my testimony to all the people in this site because i never thought i will have my girlfriend back and she means so much to me..The girl i want to get marry to left me four weeks to our wedding for another man..,When i called her she never picked my calls, She deleted me on her facebook and she changed her facebook status from married to Single…when i went to her to her place of work she never want to see me..I was confuse as a result of this because i cant get myself anymore, my life was upside down and everything did not go smooth with my life…I tried all i could do to have her back to all did not work out until i came across a spiritual man when i was browsing online.. I told him my problem and all have passed through in getting her back…he told me he gonna help me… he said he will cast a spell for me and i will see the results in the next couple of hours… My girlfriend called me at exactly 12:35pm on Thursday and apologies for all she had done ..she said,she never knew what she’s doing and her sudden behavior was not intentional and she promised not to do that again.it was like am dreaming when i heard that from her and when we ended the call,i called the man and told him my wife called and he said i haven’t seen anything yet… My life is back into shape,i have my girlfriend back and we are happily married now with kids and i have my job back too.This man is really powerful..if we have up to 20 people like him in the world,the world would have been a better place..he has also helped many of my friends to solve many problems and they are all happy now..Am posting this to this site for anybody that is interested in meeting the man for help.you can mail him to agumaguspelltemple@gmail.com hope he helped u out too..good luck

    ReplyDelete
  132. Dr. Telemi is a trust worthy spell caster and he will
    be of great help to you. I never believed in spell casting but After 4
    years of marriage my husband left me because I lost my womb, and i was
    unable to give birth to children. I felt like my life has come to an
    end, and i almost committed suicide, i was emotionally down for a very
    long time, but thanks to this spell caster called Dr. Telemi whom i met
    online after my friend Tracy James told me how he also helped her to
    bring back her husband in less than 2 days. I believed her and decided
    to give Dr. Telemi a try and i contacted him on his email Telemisolutiontemple@yahoo.com
    and explained my problems to him. He laughed and told me that In less
    than 2 days, my Husband will come back for me again, and that he will
    restore my womb and i will give birth to children. At first i thought it
    was a lie but i took courage and believed as Dr. Telemi has said and it
    did happen just as this Great spell caster said, My husband called me
    and was crying, apologizing for forgiveness. I forgave him and today i
    am so glad that all worries and problems has gone away, and we are even
    happier than before, another good news is that i am pregnant now, and
    very soon we are expecting our baby. Dr. Telemi is really a gifted and a
    powerful spiritual man and i will not stop publishing him because he is
    a wonderful man. I advice you all If you have a problem and you are
    looking for a real and genuine spell caster to solve all your problems
    just Contact Dr Telemi on his email on Telemisolutiontemple@yahoo.com
    at anytime, because he will always help you to solve all your problems.
    Once again thank you Dr. Telemi. Thank you, thank you.


    Dr. Telemi is a trust worthy spell caster and he will
    be of great help to you. I never believed in spell casting but After 4
    years of marriage my husband left me because I lost my womb, and i was
    unable to give birth to children. I felt like my life has come to an
    end, and i almost committed suicide, i was emotionally down for a very
    long time, but thanks to this spell caster called Dr. Telemi whom i met
    online after my friend Tracy James told me how he also helped her to
    bring back her husband in less than 2 days. I believed her and decided
    to give Dr. Telemi a try and i contacted him on his email Telemisolutiontemple@yahoo.com
    and explained my problems to him. He laughed and told me that In less
    than 2 days, my Husband will come back for me again, and that he will
    restore my womb and i will give birth to children. At first i thought it
    was a lie but i took courage and believed as Dr. Telemi has said and it
    did happen just as this Great spell caster said, My husband called me
    and was crying, apologizing for forgiveness. I forgave him and today i
    am so glad that all worries and problems has gone away, and we are even
    happier than before, another good news is that i am pregnant now, and
    very soon we are expecting our baby. Dr. Telemi is really a gifted and a
    powerful spiritual man and i will not stop publishing him because he is
    a wonderful man. I advice you all If you have a problem and you are
    looking for a real and genuine spell caster to solve all your problems
    just Contact Dr Telemi on his email on Telemisolutiontemple@yahoo.com
    at anytime, because he will always help you to solve all your problems.
    Once again thank you Dr. Telemi. Thank you, thank you....................................................................

    ReplyDelete
  133. I'm Gwen James from usa. My husband left me for no
    reason on 13th of
    June 2010. He moved in with another woman, I felt like killing myself
    and I've tried so many spell casters but all to no avail. My life was
    very bitter and sorrowful. Then
    one day, a friend of mine told me about this spell caster called Great
    Osoba who helped her on her own situation when her husband left her. But
    at first i
    didn't believe it because i' ve tested so many of them and it didn't
    work. she begged me further so I decided to try this spell caster
    called Great Osoba. I contacted him and i told him my problems and gave
    him all the necessary information he required.
    He just laughed and told me never to worry that my husband will call me
    back in less than two days and i believed, and after he has finished
    casting the spell my husband called me and started begging. He
    apologized and came back to me crying for a second
    chance. Today i and my husband live happily like never before. I can
    really say that this spell caster is powerful because of his work my
    husband is home again. I'm now a very happy woman and ever since he has
    shown me love like
    never before. Thank you Great Osoba I will forever be grateful to
    you. You can reach him on his email: Greatosobaspelltemple@gmail. com he will solve
    any problem you are facing now. Just contact him and see his work. once again thank you Great Osoba

    ReplyDelete
  134. my name is Robin Shelly. Seriously i flattened when my Husband of 8 years left to be with another woman in Texas. I cried and sobbed every day, until it got so bad that I couldn't bear it anymore. and i reached out to the Internet for help, until i hit on the real thing, and that is you Dr.Azuka. I almost gave up trying to get my Ex Husband back and having a contented family again.. I had tried the whole lot I knew, and with your spells, blessings and extraordinary magical powers, you did all the work, and immediately after 24 hours, my Ex Husband came back to me and he was penitent for everything that he has done. And now my life is balanced and i am happy again. Dr.Azuka you do a great service to people, and I don't think many people had known about you. You are the diamond in the rough. Thank you Dr.Azuka You are talented and you give off yourself so freely like you did to me. Thank you for weaving your magical love spells for me and Sergio. He is back to me just the way it was when we first met.. from the depths of my soul! I am immensely happy now. Thank you and God bless you so much sir. now my man is back to me just in 24 hours, as you have said it..wow.. i am fully rewarded. Thank you so much sir, Lots of appreciations.. Here is Dr.Azuka Website: website: http://greatazukalovespell.webs.com and his Email: Greatazukalovespell@gmail.com tel: +2348071398555 . Robin Shelly frm New York. his web site http://greatazukalovespell.webs.com

    ReplyDelete
  135. my name is Robin Shelly. Seriously i flattened when my Husband of 8 years left to be with another woman in Texas. I cried and sobbed every day, until it got so bad that I couldn't bear it anymore. and i reached out to the Internet for help, until i hit on the real thing, and that is you Dr.Azuka. I almost gave up trying to get my Ex Husband back and having a contented family again.. I had tried the whole lot I knew, and with your spells, blessings and extraordinary magical powers, you did all the work, and immediately after 24 hours, my Ex Husband came back to me and he was penitent for everything that he has done. And now my life is balanced and i am happy again. Dr.Azuka you do a great service to people, and I don't think many people had known about you. You are the diamond in the rough. Thank you Dr.Azuka You are talented and you give off yourself so freely like you did to me. Thank you for weaving your magical love spells for me and Sergio. He is back to me just the way it was when we first met.. from the depths of my soul! I am immensely happy now. Thank you and God bless you so much sir. now my man is back to me just in 24 hours, as you have said it..wow.. i am fully rewarded. Thank you so much sir, Lots of appreciations.. Here is Dr.Azuka Website: website: http://greatazukalovespell.webs.com and his Email: Greatazukalovespell@gmail.com tel: +2348071398555 . Robin Shelly frm New York. his web site http://greatazukalovespell.webs.com....

    ReplyDelete
  136. i want to use this medium to testify of how i got back my ex boyfriend. After 8 years in relationship with my husband with 3 kids, he suddenly started going out with other ladies and coming home late, most at times drunk and each time i confront him about this it turns out to be fight, he even threatened to divorce me severally, I was emotionally devastated because i was not sure of what to do to make him love me again, I tried all i could to make him love me again but all proved abortive until i saw a post on the internet on how a spell caster Dr. Zaki helps people restore back their broken relationship/marriage at first i doubted this but decided to give it a try, when i contacted this spell caster via email he helped me cast a re-union spell and within 5hours my husband came to me apologizing and today we are happily together again. Contact this great spell caster on your marriage and relationship problems at dr.zakispellhome@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  137. HOW MY EX HUSBAND FINALLY CAME BACK TO ME !!!

    Hello everyone , I am Barbara Senna and i am from united states....In the past ,I was in a long term relationship that suppose to lead to marriage but one day came that my fiance lost interest in me because another woman was enticing him with money and fake love.i complained to a friend of mine about what my situation was and she gave me an advice that I contact a powerful spell Caster (eminikokorospiritualhelp@hotmail.com) . At first, i was lackadaisical contacting him but one faithful day, I took a bold step and i contacted him and he replied saying he would help me.. to cut the long story short,he caste a spell and my husband came back to me within 3 days..it was just a surprise to me as I never believed my husband would come back begging for forgiveness. Afterwards we got married, we just came back from honey moon some few days back.. here i am today testifying happily...I said to myself that I would share this to the world if my problem becomes a thing of the past..now I am happy and I am happy sharing it on here happily to all my friends.. so I urge any one who have problems of any kind be it any of these;
    if you want your ex back? if you want to bind your husband with you forever?if you want to be cured of Cancer? if you want to be cured of HIV/AIDS? if you disabled? if you want to be prosperous? if you want to have increase in finance? if you want favor and goodluck? if you want to lose weight? if you want to gain weight? if you are barren and you want to have a child? If some who owes you and dont want to pay you back? if you want to be rich and lot more?

    contact him now.His email address: eminikokorospiritualhelp@hotmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  138. Have been all over looking for solution to my Marriage until i tried out the internet, I found Dr. Zexta Gio whom people talked about and shared good testimonies about him, My Husband has decide to leave our marriage, because he said he can't stand my mom, But i love my Husband so much that i can let him leave after 8years of marriage. So the Dr. Zexta Gio did changed the whole problems and issue to testimony, He did a spell to calm and reconcile my mom and my Husband and then carryout a spell to make my husband love me more and remain in our marriage. I saw results after 2days and to be frank and sincere, this Dr. Zexta Gio is a God sent. My family is as peaceful and lovely as i asked for. I'm grateful friends in case you need the help of Dr. Zexta Gio kindly mail him on (airehobhuanuagbontemple@yahoo.com). Sir, i will forever recommend you all over the world.

    ReplyDelete
  139. Hello everyone I want to share a live testimony on how Dr Alabart was able to bring my husband back to me, myself and my husband were on a serious breakup, even before then we were always quarreling fighting and doing different ungodly act..

    My husband packed his things out of the house and we had to live in different area, despite all this I was looking for a way to re_unite with my husband, not until I met Dr Alabart the great spell caster who was able to bring my husband back home, Dr Alabart cast a love spell for me, and after some time I started seen results about the spell....

    Today my family is back again and we are happy living fine and healthy, with Dr Alabart all my dream came through in re_uniting my marriage, friends in case you need the help of Dr Alabart kindly mail him on(ogojidogospirituallovespell@gmail.com )

    ReplyDelete
  140. OMG!! This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony..I visited a
    forum here on the internet on the 20TH OF JUNE 2014, And i saw a
    marvelous testimony of this powerful and great spell caster called
    PRIEST AZIBA on the forum..I never believed it, because i never heard
    nor
    learnt anything about magic before.. Not a soul would have been able to
    influence me about magical spells, not until PRIEST AZIBA did it for me
    and restored my marriage of 8 years back to me and brought my spouse
    back to me in the same 24 hours just as i read on the internet..i was
    truly astonished and shocked when my husband knelt down begging for
    forgiveness and for me to accept him back.. I am really short of
    expressions, and i don't know how much to convey my appreciation to you
    PRIEST AZIBA you are a God sent to me and my entire family.. And now i
    am a joyful woman once again.. here is his website: http://priestazibasolutioncenter.webs.com Email: priestazibasolutioncenter@
    gmail.com.....Mobile:+2348100368288.......Mrs Chris Windy, from USA, Los Angeles

    ReplyDelete
  141. My name is Rebecca Miller I'm from united state, i have been married for 4 years and i have a break up with my husband 3 months ago and i was worried and so confuse because i love him so much. i was really going too depressed and a friend directed me to this spell caster Dr. Laco and i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come back to the house. i have never in my life believe in spell and but now it have just helped me and i am now so happy. All Thanks to him and if you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his emailAddress(lacopowerfulspellcaster@yahoo.com) i am so happy to testify of your work and kindness (lacopowerfulspellcaster@yahoo.com)

    ReplyDelete
  142. My name is Rebecca Miller I'm from united state, i have been married for
    4 years and i have a break up with my husband 3 months ago and i was
    worried and so confuse because i love him so much. i was really going
    too depressed and a friend directed me to this spell caster Dr. Laco and
    i made all my problems known to him and he told me not to worry that he
    was going to make my husband to come back to me and in just 48hours i
    receive a call from my husband and he was appealing that i should come
    back to the house. i have never in my life believe in spell and but now
    it have just helped me and i am now so happy. All Thanks to him and if
    you also want to have your Husband back to yourself here !! his
    emailAddress(lacopowerfulspellcaster@yahoo.com) i am so happy to testify
    of your work and kindness (lacopowerfulspellcaster@yahoo.com)

    ReplyDelete
  143. No one could have ever made me believe that the letter I'm about to write would actually one day be written. I was the world’s biggest sceptic. I never believed in magic spells or anything like that, but I was told by a reliable source (a very close co-worker) that Dr Marvel is a very dedicated, gifted, and talented person, and after much “cajoling,” she (my co-worker) got me to visit this website http://extremespellhome.webs.com. It was one of the best things I have ever done. My love life was in shambles; I had been through two divorces and was on the brink of a third. I just couldn't face another divorce, and I wanted to try harder to make our relationship work, but my husband didn't seem to care. So, with nothing but my pride to lose, I checked it out. I was flabbergasted. Dr Marvel is for REAL. He did whatever magic he does, and lo and behold – no more than TWO DAYS later, I had my husband back! It was like a miracle! He suddenly wanted to go to marriage counselling, and we’re doing very, very well, on the road to recovery! Love and Many Blessings Back to You! Contact Dr Marvel through his website http://extremespellhome.webs.com or his email on extremespellhome@hotmail.com or extremespellhome@gmail.com.

    ReplyDelete
  144. Am here to testify for the good deeds Prophet sulemandid for me. I was a HIV patient until I met Prophet suleman who cured my disease, I was bothered, I don’t want to leave my family behind, I don’t want to die, that was my thought day and night, I was told about him ( Prophet suleman) by a friend of mine, he gave me his email address, which is Prophetsuleman@gmail.com I emailed him and told him my problems, he helped me by casting a direct spell on me, here am I today free from that bondage, I healed, you can contact him via email,Prophetsuleman@gmail.com

    ReplyDelete
  145. I was in desperate search of some way to make my ex boyfriend fall
    back in love with me. We have had our ups and downs, but over the past 6
    months our relationship went south. I have spent 500+ on a spell caster
    that I thought would help me and not knowing that she didn't helped. I
    am reaching out because I want to be the desirable woman that I used to
    be and him fall back in love with me, and marry me. I can't picture this
    boy with anyone else until i really contacted Dr. Ikhine who make my
    dreams via him agbadado@gmail.comor via +2347060552255 it really works

    ReplyDelete
  146. My lover dumped me for any another woman, and i was divorce by my husband with my two son after 8 years of marriage, and also i really love him, so i contacted Doctor Akim for a love spell to get my Husband back, to my greatest surprise he cast a love binding spell to get him back for me and my lover came back after 48 hours. i will advice you anyone looking for any kindx of spell should contact Doctor Akin via email address: { amormedico@hotmail.com }

    From: Ontario

    Name : Carina Gomez

    ReplyDelete
  147. before people said there is no cure on HIV/AIDS but today many people have now believe that there is a cure. HIV/AIDS can be cured through Africans root and harms,and days our great doctors have finally found the cure of HIV/AIDS, many have get cured with the help of a great spell caster known as Prophet Suleman he is the one of the great spell doctor in Africa and he has the cure on this disease HIV/AIDS. last month he share is Haber medicine in some medical hospital and now he is well recognize as one of the best spell caster in Africa, you don't have to be sad any more or share your tears any more on this disease when the cure have already be found. in 2013 the total number of people living with HIV/AIDS was 12.9 million but today the total number is 1.6 million if you want to get in touch with him in private contact him on this e-mail below: Prophetsuleman@gmail.com or call good luck..

    ReplyDelete
  148. THE GRAT Dr.Oboite THAT BRING MY HUSBAND BACK TO ME AM NOW A HAPPY WOMAN i am sharing my testimony to everyone that has tried everything possible and had lost hope on how they can get their ex back, i want you all to know that their is one man called Dr.Oboite that work for me and after 2days of his spell. my ex came back to me without any delay, i am really happy now that we are together again and we are living happily with so much love and respect for each other, so i will advise everyone to ask for this same man's help so that you can be happy again and make your dreams and wishes you have with your ex come true. via droboitespellcaster@outlook.com he can help you without any delay

    ReplyDelete
  149. i am really short of words, can't finally believe i got my boyfriend back this is my testimony about the man that brought back my man Dr Shiva within the period of 2days my boyfriend of 2 years breakup with me 3 months ago and i contacted Dr Shiva on his email: reunitingexspell2@gmail.com and he help me to get back my boyfriend and right now we are living happily and getting very ready and set for our wedding, i am so much happy knowing full well there are real, true spell casters who can really make things happen within the shortest possible time. for help you can reach him on reunitingexspell@yahoo.com or Tel:+2347051705853

    ReplyDelete
  150. Hello to every one out here, am here to share the unexpected miracle that happened to me three days ago, My name is Edwin Wallace i live in United State,and I`m happily married to a lovely and caring wife,with two kids A very big problem occurred in my family seven months ago,between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(kemespelltemple@gmail.com }, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven {7}months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there to kindly visit the same website {kemespelltemple@gmail.com },i f you are in any condition like this,or you have any problem related to "bringing your ex back. So thanks to Dr KUME for bringing back my wife,and brought great joy to my family once again.(kemespelltemple@gmail.com }, Thanks..

    ReplyDelete