Please stop thirsting over new PM Justin Trudeau.
Pictured: New Canadian PM, Justin Trudeau
I understand. The average politician looks like a leather handbag in an expensive suit who sold their soul for the suit. Trudeau has flowing locks and looks like he might still have a soul.
Pictured: Trudeau giving his best bedroom eyes with deeply questionable facial hair
Next to them, he looks like a total beef cake. I get it. But out of that context? He's ok looking.
Pictured: Trudeau looking shocked that I just called him ok looking.
I'd let him buy me a drink at the bar, I've got enough French in me that I know my Mother would probably be dissapointed if a Nice French Boy who looked like that chatted me up to not even give him a shot. You know, pretending he's not like 15 years older than I am and we're not both married.
Pictured: An awkward close up of Trudeau with different deeply questionable facial hair
Still, I think it's kind of disrespectful of the world to have ignored our election up until after we elected a babe. Do you know anything about his policies? Like his plan to run a 3-year deficit to stimulate the economy, or ungag scientist (which has been a huge problem) or to launch an investigation into missing and murdered indigenous women and generally a huge push towards evidence based policy making? Also he wants to legalize pot. Not one I care much about but I know how y'all do. Do you know he probably could have run with promises of high-fives because our former PM is a baby-eating robot with a shitty band who is super racist and had been in power for ten years and Canadians desperately wanted him out? Are you yet questioning our wisdom in electing a man who has actually had super villain facial hair?
Pictured: Trudeau with super villain facial hair and flowing locks
Because you should be. I mean, it's not like we had any other options, but still.
Pictured: NDP leader "Angry" Tom Mulcair looking like he's earning his nickname
If nothing else, please, stop calling Trudeau "Daddy". It assumes a level of intimacy that even Canadians don't (yet) have with him. Let us, as a country, work out our own weird sex stuff before throwing your own baggage in there.